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I Finally Get What Those Crazy Hippies Were Talking About

November 1, 2011

In a world of fad diets, viral web videos, and hipster bands just unpopular enough to have a cult following, we’re constantly looking three steps ahead, trying to figure out what’s next. I’m just as guilty, as I stalk bookmarked blogs, wake up to Twitter, and spend my walks to class wondering what I need to do next, instead of enjoying the perfectly crisp fall weather so rare in Texas. We are a generation of time-wasters and problem solvers. How does that make any sense? Well, we waste time solving problems that probably don’t even really exist or at the very least, pale in comparison to other problems.

Naturally, this habit seeps into our love lives, because we cant imagine a world where things just are. Is it that impossible to imagine that something might just feel right the way it is, that we have to go and create problems for us to fix to feel right with the world again? Do you even remember the last time you had one of those “lay in the grass” moments, where you could care less about your classes, or that girl who said that one annoying thing that one time, when you didn’t care about anything in your own life because you were too busy not being busy at all? It’s a little Alice in Wonderland but the point is simple—maybe the reason so many of us claim to be unlucky in love, has nothing to do with luck at all, but instead, the fact that we’re in a constant troubleshooting mindset, even when there’s nothing to fix.

Think about it, we get on Facebook, research people we’ve barely met, expect to know everything and then get caught totally off guard when something even feels slightly uncomfortable, and launch into “fix this shit” mode, completely forgetting that first dates are just generally uncomfortable, forgetting that sometimes you’re supposed to put your foot in your mouth with your semi-inappropriate jokes and one too many vodka sodas.

And even when things are great, we have so much trouble just taking it for face value, leaving it behind without worrying what the next move is. I’ve never been the “let the chips fall where they may, whatever happens happens” type and I probably never will be, but I have to admit, I sort of get it now. I get where those crazy hippies are coming from.

I guess I’m just too addicted to my issues to abandon them completely (ironic when people with abandonment issues cant seem to abandon them) but I believe to some extent we all have the love lives we secretly want. Because if you really wanted things to be easy (like I overhear you tell your girls at Starbucks like on the daily), your problem-fixing mind, that’s so good at figuring out how to view someone’s private profile, would’ve already made those things easy, and because if you really wanted things to be uncomplicated then you wouldn’t have complicated them…

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2 Comments leave one →
  1. November 2, 2011 9:58 am

    I get where you’re coming from with the “troubleshooting mindset” I think especially lately this phrase describes me spot-on. We do seem to be a generation of human beings who don’t really know anymore what it means to just sit back and enjoy a breather, like, let’s say a day of simply lazing around and doing nothing except relaxing, resting and enjoying the slowed-down rhythm. We’ve forgotten how to accept the good without finding little cracks that need gluing, even though they do not threaten in any way the structural integrity of the good thing in the first place.

  2. November 2, 2011 12:37 pm

    Love it! Especially the part about “face value!” :)
    -Jamie

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